Word of the Day - crapulous


Crapulous – of or relating to drunkenness

Use crapulous in a sentence:

Everybody was there—John Delorean, Shaq, five or six Dolphins cheerleaders, this dude claiming to be Castro’s nephew with a wicked pompadour, shirt opened down to his waist and a big gold chain, had a feeling the sucker’d be floatin’ face first in the hot tub before the dawn of the new year, had that look about him, hell, even, could it be, yep, that was definitely Bono lighting up in the corner, talking to Helena Christensen, hadn’t seen that cat in ages – I checked my watch, midnight was only a few clicks away and still no sign, I was starting to get a little worried, not worried worried, but worried nonetheless, and then I heard that telltale rustling up on the roof, happened like this every year, and the crash of broken glass—see, we don’t have fireplaces in Miami, in the land of sunshine, so the cat insists on coming in through the skylight, and there he is, old Saint Nick rolling around on the floor in that dirty red and white Santa suit. He made it to his feet and staggered– crapulous, red nosed, bloated— toward the bar. He was followed down the hatch in short order by his posse of “elves” dressed in their skimpy lederhosen (hey, each to their own), then Rudolf with his nose so bright, Blitzen with his nose so bright, then the rest of them reindeer, hell, it was true what they say, they all had noses like that, that lit up the night, then Rudolf Hess, I kid you not, dude is twisted, totally egregious, gangsta, Rudolph Valentino (what was this, the end of the year or the end of the world?)—I played it cool for a click, but see, I was twitchin’, we were all twichin’ by then, so I walked up to old Saint Nick and put my hand on his shoulder and personally poured him a snifter of Courvoisier, let him throw it back, and said happy holidays and all, but it’s time for business – old Saint Nick’s got his problems, but he’s a pro, see, and right away he nods to them elves who haul that big ol’ sack of his over to the pool table, and Saint Nick flashes a smile so bright and picks up that sack in his arms and turns it over and you should have seen the look on all the children’s faces, their smiles so bright, as he shook that sack and out came all that beautiful snow.


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